FIRESTARTER Remake - Theaters/Peacock - 5/13

[AndyDursin]

Interesting John Carpenter, his son and company are scoring this. Good call seeing as their scores on the new Halloween movies are at least competent!

[Monterey Jack]

Interesting John Carpenter, his son and company are scoring this.

Kind of weirdly apt, as Carpenter was going to direct the 1984 film until he got yanked off barely weeks before cameras were scheduled to roll thanks to the box office implosion of the Thing.

I'll see this...the 80s film is bland as hell, so this can only be an improvement. Amazed it took this long to remake, especially considering how much Stranger Things cribbed from King's book.

[Monterey Jack]

3.5/10



I take back my previous misgivings about the 1984 film, which is still bland as hell but a damn sight better than this lifeless mess. Barely adhering to King's novel (one wonders if the producers were leery of being branded "a Stranger Things ripoff" had they more faithfully adapted King's text), this new version suffers from cheapjack production values, mediocre acting, a seriously threadbare narrative (running all of 94 minutes) and new additions to the story that range from goofy to what-were-they-thinking (especially a horrible ending that plays like this was intended as a pilot for a prospective TV series). The only aspect that works is the soundtrack by John & Cody Carpenter and Daniel Davies...it has the same strengths as their recent collaborations on the Blumhouse Halloween films, and ought to sound great on CD. The rest of the film has no style, no suspense, wastes Kurtwood Smith in a one-scene cameo and is a chore to sit through. There are a few wanly amusing easter eggs for Stephen King junkies (like bottles of "Ayuh" beer), but overall it's a complete dud, the worst King adaptation since that miserable Dark Tower flick from five years back.

[AndyDursin]

Might as well watch 5 minutes on Peacock before shutting it off.